So Why Can’t I Rest????

I am fascinated by relational topics. That is probably because I have spent most of my life “relationally challenged”. As you might expect, there are some good reasons for that. But there are no good reasons to stay that way. I am always shocked when I discover a relational truth that other people know, but I was totally unaware of. That happened this week.


I have always been a productive person. I do not need anyone to look over my shoulder and create a list of tasks for me to accomplish. I start every day with a To-Do list that I have created. In the past, I suffered from a “performance mentality”. That mentality says, “the more you get done; the more you are worth”. I don’t live there anymore. My value is now based on the fact that I was created in the image of God. I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and Jesus paid the ultimate price to have relationship with me. That is my value.


So, why can’t I rest???


A pastor friend asked me one time why I took adventurous vacations instead of just sitting on the beach and relaxing. He said my life was chaotic enough, why did I want to add more stress to my life? He saw a striving in me that I could not see in myself. Looking back, I realize I never took a REAL day off, even when I was on vacation.


So, why can’t I rest???


A dear person in my life recently took a year off from her career. She was exhausted and needed a break. She actually was being totally re-worked by the Lord. Upon hearing her story, someone else dear to me said that they would be miserable if they had to take a year off. As they pondered this, they realized that they could take an extended period of time off IF THEY COULD SPEND IT WITH THEIR FRIENDS. They deduced that rest sounded attractive, only if it involved hanging out with people they enjoyed being with.


So, why can’t I rest???


I can now. I have found some friends (relationships without a purpose). I never really had friends in my life outside of high school. I hung out with the people I worked with. So all my relationships were, to a degree, performance based. Today, I have friends that I can hang out with and talk for hours without any concern for time. In fact, I leave energized when I have been with them.


I am convinced that the reason I could never rest was I never developed friends outside of work. Maybe that is your struggle too. I am now on the other side and hope you can get there to. For more on this subject visit

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